Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Eli's Elevator Speech

Andrew Revkin recently put out a call for an elevator speech on climate change. Andy wanted something that could get through to a newly elected president. Several of the usual suspects including Not Really a PhD Courtney responded with ones so long that they must have been thinking they were in space elevators going to the moon.

For those who don't know, an elevator speech is

an extremely pithy description of something, prepared in advance to be used in situations where time is of the essence. The term comes from the hyopthetical situation of somebody seeing a pin or something similar on your person that arouses their curiosity while in an elevator . . . and then asking you what exactly the pin stands for. . . .the prepared elevator speech serves to provide as best of an answer as possible in the available time.
So here is Eli's environmental elevator speech. You are welcome to contribute in the comments and we will move good ones up, however, elevator speeches of over 4 lines will be consigned to the memory hole (UPDATE: in a good elevator speech syllables count).
We are conducting an uncontrolled experiment that is altering the land, the atmosphere air and the oceans. Everything we know says it will end badly, the principal uncertainty is when. We are all in the test tube, but you can do something about it.
UPDATE: Simon Donner has an elevator graphic the kind that someone says what's that while you are showing her your kids pictures. That is why we are worried about their future

13 comments:

Hank Roberts said...

From here:
http://www.slate.com/id/2561/

Four thoughts, use one per floor:

If something cannot go on forever, it will stop.
--Stein's Law

Three percent exceeds 2 percent by 50 percent, not by 1 percent.
--Edward Denison, in conversation, about 1960

prediction of whether or not the capitalist order will survive is, in part, a matter of terminology.
--Joseph Shumpeter, Encyclopedia Britannica, 1945

Capitalism survived its crisis and went on to great successes. But the capitalism that survived and succeeded was not the capitalism of 1929.
--Herbert Stein, The Triumph of the Adaptive Society, 1989

David B. Benson said...

Here is a refreshing idea

Cap and Dividend

Please help pass the word.

Anonymous said...

Humankind does not realise how really good it is. Within the ranks are the gutless,the soulless, the visionless, who seek to drag us back to their level.

JohnS

Sam-Hec said...

I'd recommend adding something about getting a Level 1 Civilization out the of the effort to control CO2.

Anonymous said...

"Within the ranks are the gutless,the soulless, the visionless, who seek to drag us back to their level."

Don't leave yourself out, John: the clueless.

EliRabett said...

David, the bunnies and anonymice unanimously prefer Rabett's simple plan to save the world.

Cap and whatever is going to get sliced up by the denialists until nothing is done or what is done is completely ineffective.

John Mashey said...

This doesn't make sense.

You offer a picture of an elevator type whose traversal time likely allows one to read much of the AR4 aloud .... and then give us a 3 sentence elevator speech, barely sufficient for one floor.

Anonymous said...

Actually, it does make sense if you read Eli's key sentence: "Several of the usual suspects including Not Really a PhD Courtney responded with ones so long that they must have been thinking they were in space elevators going to the moon."

Anonymous said...

Here's my elevator speech, for the case where you mistakenly get on the "UP" elevator when you wanted to go down and want to quickly get off before the door shuts:

"We're all in the same elevator, but each of us can do something about it. Me, I'm outa here."

Chuck said...

If we don't curb emissions, the global mean temperature will reach levels not seen since the oil we're burning was still alive.

Anonymous said...

"I am a BDS inflicted lefty loser and want to bring you down"

Cyberchrome said...

The patient has been examined by 100 doctors. Ninety-five diagnose a food intolerance to chocolate and prescribe a phased replacement of chocolate by other foodstuffs. Five disagree with some part of the diagnosis or the treatment, though they are unable to supply a convincing alternative diagnosis. Of these five, four work for chocolate companies and three are liars and fraudsters. The choice of treatment is now up to you.

Anonymous said...

"The chickens are coming home to roost and all the eggs are in one basket. But at the end of the day, when all is said and done, and done and dusted, and the fat lady's singing her adipose-tissue-encrusted li'l heart out: it's the CO2, stupid!"

This elevator piece has been designed compartmentally. If it's a single-floor ride (apart from you should be using the stairs you lazy B*), then you can curtail it to the final clause. I reckon it's good for half a dozen floors. Maybe a couple more floors in a slow Southern drawl and suitably interspersed with the meaningless silent pauses and pauses for nods that so seem to have punctuated Presidential and Prime Ministerial speeches these last few years.


Cymraeg llygoden

with a nod and a chicken wing to William J. Clinton's speech writer and to Mr Hackneyed-Phrase.